Spanish waiter dies after 12 hours shift of Great British banter

A Spanish waiter has died following a full 12 hour shift of a British group’s banter, we can reveal.

Juan Alvaro perished after the large group of friends from the North of England sat on a table he was waiting on in the hotel restaurant he worked at. After a relentless 12 hours of British banter, he didn’t make it home.

Fellow waiter Jorge said he was worried for his colleague all day, he told us, ‘They started early with him, as lunch time soon became an evening meal.’

‘They referred to him as ‘Manuel’ followed by severely minutes of laughter. He was struggling from there on. Later on one of them said continuously ‘Where’s Basil?’. None of us know what the fook that means.’

‘Soon enough the energy was zapped from Juan and he looked like he’d been in a war he just couldn’t win. We were all helpless as we had our own troubles. After his shift he just walked off into the night, like a man who had been shot at relentlessly by terrible jokes he had no option but to accept. We see this year after year.’

It is thought some restaurants are piloting a scheme using hardened Syrians acting as Spanish waiters.