Met Police accidentally appoint Rose West as chief

The metropolitan police have admitted to an error which led to them appointing Rose West as the new boss.

West, 70, was pleased to take the role and had made improvements in the few hours before the mistake was discovered.

Acting Chief John Dot said, ‘We’d like to thank the public for flagging up this error as soon as they saw a few improvements being made.’

An anonymous officer told us, ‘We weren’t happy when we saw her name go on the office door but it’s difficult to know what’s what when one of our last bosses was called Cressida Dick and we literally employed rapists.’

‘You can say many things about Mrs West but even in those few hours of her doing nothing, things were better. She took no messing from the mayor of London, told him to buck up his ideas on knife crime or he’ll find himself under a patio.’

Sadiq Khan said, ‘I’m relieved this has been sorted. For a minute there someone was holding me responsible but we can now continue as we were.’